Right now I'm sitting here having breakfast between two squabbling siblings. I want to pop both of their heads off and enjoy the silence. But, instead I'm going to let them work it out on there own.
This morning has been a slow process. I'm swollen like a puffer fish and as weak as dollar store coffee. Late night with Kaden. And yesterday I started cleaning some old books in our garage which turned into Skylar and I cleaning out the garage. After the garage we decided to clean the van out. Thanh came home and was shocked! What got into the both of you. I told him that I had a burst of energy. And when the energy graces my body I take advantage of it.
With every roller coaster you go uuuuuuup and then dooooooooooown. So, to prepare for the down I took a few extra pills, had a healthy dinner with lots of water and went to bed early. I woke up feeling better then most days after heavy activity. So, that just confirms to me that I'm learning how to read my ever changing body signals. Go Me!
Today we need to finish up our school work and then get ready for the weekend. Mahala is having two friends over tomorrow. Of course I have a whole day of activities planned. We are going to have a cooking lesson, 2 craft activities and a scavenger hunt. Then one of her friends will be sleeping over and we are going to do facials and pedicures. Fun, fun, fun!!!!!!
Well, the heat between thing 1 and thing 2 has went from boiling to simmer. So, I think it's safe to mingle with the locals now. Write more soon.
3.13.2009
3.04.2009
1,414 people touched
I have to say a Million Thank yous to everyone that helped me get the word out for Lupus Awareness Day!!! Every comment and every email that I received was like a gentle hug of " we are with you on this battle field". And it's not just for me, it's for everyone that has Lupus or knows and loves some one with it.
My blog had 1,414 people log on. Thanks to you they were educated and passed the love on. YEAH!!!!!
Today was a long day, so I'm going to make this short. I will post something tomorrow late morning. I was just shocked to see the numbers and had to say something. To everyone that emailed me questions or wrote them in the comments I will get back with answers soon.
My blog had 1,414 people log on. Thanks to you they were educated and passed the love on. YEAH!!!!!
Today was a long day, so I'm going to make this short. I will post something tomorrow late morning. I was just shocked to see the numbers and had to say something. To everyone that emailed me questions or wrote them in the comments I will get back with answers soon.
3.02.2009
Help Me find a Cure for My Disease...Please.
Most of you all know that I suffer from Lupus. I hate to say suffer, but I do. My whole family suffers.
Basically Lupus is when your immune system attacks your organs and body instead of all the bad viruses, bacterias and such that a healthy person's immune system would.
I'm in constant pain and most days I find myself thankful for just getting a bath ans my family fed on any givin' day. My joints swell sometimes to the point that I can't put on jeans or write because I can't hold a pencil. I have sores in my mouth from the methotrexate I have to take ( it's a form of Chemo). This is what suppresses my immune system, which also means I catch everyday illnesses easily. Mahala can get a cold and I will catch it. But it will turn into pneumonia and I may also develop a UTI or other sicknesses.
I have several autoimmune diseases as a result of my lupus. Rheumatoid arthritis is one of them. I take around 40 pills a day and some days I am so nauseous and tired that I home school from the couch or bed. I am very thankful for my good days, every morning when I open my eyes I slowly draw in my first conscious breath. I pray that I can move and get through the day. I pray to be able to have a "normal" day with my children. And when I can't and Thanh has to help me to the bathroom or when I just can't make it at all, I pray for another chance. Another chance for my body to get it right the next time.
Did you know that it has been over 50 years since there has been any advancements in the medical world regarding Lupus? No new treatments or drugs. That makes me cry and makes me fearful. It makes me feel hollow inside, like I'm lost and never to be found. I want to scream!!!!!! We are dying here people, help us pleeeeeeeease!!! Our children are going to be Motherless and Fatherless!! We are in pain and full of fear just praying for relief and comfort.
Today, March 3, 2009 is the Lupus Foundation of America’s 11th Annual Advocacy Day on Capitol Hill. Even if you cannot physically join us on Tuesday, there are still several things you – and your family and friends – can do to help raise awareness about the seriousness of lupus. Before I developed Lupus I had never heard of it before. Have you ever heard of it?
Fifty years is too long to wait for safer, more tolerable and effective FDA-approved lupus treatments. Help the estimated 1.5 million Americans living with lupus by being a part of the "Call-In to Congress" component of the Lupus Foundation of America’s 11th Annual Advocacy Day on March 3, 2009.Simply go online to the LFA's advocacy action center located at http://www.capwiz.com/lfa, and click on the link called "Call your Members of Congress Tuesday, March 3rd!" Then, you’ll enter your zip code and get the phone numbers for your elected officials.The other thing you will notice after you’ve entered your zip code, is that you will also see a guide of Talking Points for when you speak with Congressional Staff. Use these talking points to tell them how having lupus or knowing someone with lupus has affected your life.The link to the LFA’s advocacy action center again is http://www.capwiz.com/lfa.Together, we can change the future of those affected by lupus.
PLEASE, I know that we all say what can ONE person do. But, I am here to tell YOU that one person can do A Lot. What if you are the one that made the difference. It was the straw that broke the camel's back so to say, but in this situation it would be a positive thing.
Please stand up for me and everyone in this world who has Lupus on March 3rd. Please pass this info on to EVERYONE that you know that breaths air. Plaster Manic Mom all over the place and let's make a difference in the lives of Many!!!
You can also Send an e-card to your friends & family. Raise awareness about lupus and the need for new treatments by sending your friends and family an e-card. Go here to send an e-card.
Donate. With your donation we can continue to fund cutting-edge lupus research. Go here to make a donation.
There is one very simple thing you can do in Facebook. Below is suggested text that you can use for your status on your Facebook account for Tuesday, March 3, 2009. Encourage your family and friends to change their statuses as well.
"YOUR NAME is encouraging friends and family to support the LFA’s Advocacy Day. Tell Congress 50 years without a new FDA-approved lupus drug is too long http://www.capwiz.com/lfa"
If you have a Twitter account and are joining us for Advocacy Day, you can "tweet" your Advocacy Day experience. You might want to post updates such as "Heading to Capitol Hill now" or "Meeting with Senator Young."If you’re not able to be on Capitol Hill, you can still use your Twitter account to encourage people to call their Senators and Representatives, and raise awareness about the need for new, safe, tolerable, and effective treatments. Below are some suggested "tweets."
"Support LFA’s Advocacy Day. Tell Congress 50 years without a new FDA-approved lupus drug is too long. http://www.capwiz.com/lfa""Join me and call Congress and tell them 50 years without a new FDA-approved lupus drug is too long. http://www.capwiz.com/lfa"
Leave a comment or email me if you posted this info on your blog, told family and friends, donnated, contacted Congress or even prayed. Anything is better then nothing. Love to All!!!!
Basically Lupus is when your immune system attacks your organs and body instead of all the bad viruses, bacterias and such that a healthy person's immune system would.
I'm in constant pain and most days I find myself thankful for just getting a bath ans my family fed on any givin' day. My joints swell sometimes to the point that I can't put on jeans or write because I can't hold a pencil. I have sores in my mouth from the methotrexate I have to take ( it's a form of Chemo). This is what suppresses my immune system, which also means I catch everyday illnesses easily. Mahala can get a cold and I will catch it. But it will turn into pneumonia and I may also develop a UTI or other sicknesses.
I have several autoimmune diseases as a result of my lupus. Rheumatoid arthritis is one of them. I take around 40 pills a day and some days I am so nauseous and tired that I home school from the couch or bed. I am very thankful for my good days, every morning when I open my eyes I slowly draw in my first conscious breath. I pray that I can move and get through the day. I pray to be able to have a "normal" day with my children. And when I can't and Thanh has to help me to the bathroom or when I just can't make it at all, I pray for another chance. Another chance for my body to get it right the next time.
Did you know that it has been over 50 years since there has been any advancements in the medical world regarding Lupus? No new treatments or drugs. That makes me cry and makes me fearful. It makes me feel hollow inside, like I'm lost and never to be found. I want to scream!!!!!! We are dying here people, help us pleeeeeeeease!!! Our children are going to be Motherless and Fatherless!! We are in pain and full of fear just praying for relief and comfort.
Today, March 3, 2009 is the Lupus Foundation of America’s 11th Annual Advocacy Day on Capitol Hill. Even if you cannot physically join us on Tuesday, there are still several things you – and your family and friends – can do to help raise awareness about the seriousness of lupus. Before I developed Lupus I had never heard of it before. Have you ever heard of it?
Fifty years is too long to wait for safer, more tolerable and effective FDA-approved lupus treatments. Help the estimated 1.5 million Americans living with lupus by being a part of the "Call-In to Congress" component of the Lupus Foundation of America’s 11th Annual Advocacy Day on March 3, 2009.Simply go online to the LFA's advocacy action center located at http://www.capwiz.com/lfa, and click on the link called "Call your Members of Congress Tuesday, March 3rd!" Then, you’ll enter your zip code and get the phone numbers for your elected officials.The other thing you will notice after you’ve entered your zip code, is that you will also see a guide of Talking Points for when you speak with Congressional Staff. Use these talking points to tell them how having lupus or knowing someone with lupus has affected your life.The link to the LFA’s advocacy action center again is http://www.capwiz.com/lfa.Together, we can change the future of those affected by lupus.
PLEASE, I know that we all say what can ONE person do. But, I am here to tell YOU that one person can do A Lot. What if you are the one that made the difference. It was the straw that broke the camel's back so to say, but in this situation it would be a positive thing.
Please stand up for me and everyone in this world who has Lupus on March 3rd. Please pass this info on to EVERYONE that you know that breaths air. Plaster Manic Mom all over the place and let's make a difference in the lives of Many!!!
You can also Send an e-card to your friends & family. Raise awareness about lupus and the need for new treatments by sending your friends and family an e-card. Go here to send an e-card.
Donate. With your donation we can continue to fund cutting-edge lupus research. Go here to make a donation.
There is one very simple thing you can do in Facebook. Below is suggested text that you can use for your status on your Facebook account for Tuesday, March 3, 2009. Encourage your family and friends to change their statuses as well.
"YOUR NAME is encouraging friends and family to support the LFA’s Advocacy Day. Tell Congress 50 years without a new FDA-approved lupus drug is too long http://www.capwiz.com/lfa"
If you have a Twitter account and are joining us for Advocacy Day, you can "tweet" your Advocacy Day experience. You might want to post updates such as "Heading to Capitol Hill now" or "Meeting with Senator Young."If you’re not able to be on Capitol Hill, you can still use your Twitter account to encourage people to call their Senators and Representatives, and raise awareness about the need for new, safe, tolerable, and effective treatments. Below are some suggested "tweets."
"Support LFA’s Advocacy Day. Tell Congress 50 years without a new FDA-approved lupus drug is too long. http://www.capwiz.com/lfa""Join me and call Congress and tell them 50 years without a new FDA-approved lupus drug is too long. http://www.capwiz.com/lfa"
Leave a comment or email me if you posted this info on your blog, told family and friends, donnated, contacted Congress or even prayed. Anything is better then nothing. Love to All!!!!
3.01.2009
Red Mustache & Painted Toenails
I'm bored, so I thought I would take a trip down memory lane. Keep arms and feet inside the vehicle at all times. And no chewing gum!
Skylar is feeling so much better now. His throat is healing well. And he is eating just about everything that he wants to eat. While he was all broken up I thought it would be fun to tell him some " when I was....."stories.
So, when I had my tonsils and adenoids out besides the hell fire in my throat I remember the tomato soup incident.
Picture this with me- Poor young girl struggling to breath and swallow. Needing nourishment and love to survive yet another day. I was hanging on by a thread and the thread was worn thin.
Can you picture that? Can you? Okay, some of that was true I swear. But, there was a ton of super Mario playing and endless ice cream bowls filled to the brim. Oh, and let's not forget about Kraft's Mac N cheese. My gut was so full of fake pasta and powdered cheese there was no way I was going to die from starvation.
So, anyway the lady I was staying with at the time had made me a little lunchy pooh one day. *Flash Back*I had my operation when I was 14, so my parents had already died and I was living with my 2nd family at that time.
Back to the little lunchy pooh. She had made me soup. Hot, thick, nasty tomato soup. I smiled and retrieved the Big bowl from her. And tried to look impressed and gracious. My brain went into over drive. What can I do to get rid of this mess. What are my options. I thought about the bathroom first. But, I was weak and maybe she would notice me walking down the hall. Or the pipes could clog up with it's nastiness! I thought about lifting the carpet and putting it under the pad. I know.....crazy, I was 14 on pain pills cut me some slack. And then I saw her scrawny miniature poodle sway into the room with it's little painted toenails. I never really liked that dog. JACKPOT!!!! Come here little darling!!!!!
She of coursed hopped on the bed and started sniffing the red mess. Her little tongue licked at it slow at first and then she was excited. I guess it must be better then puppy kibble. I noticed a little gagging going on and I took the bowl from her. And as if God was trying to punish me I noticed the dog had a RED mustache. WHY......LORD WHY!!!!!!
I tried to wipe it's little mouth clean and gave up because I was woosie. At this point I was tired and I looked on the floor where this particular house had it vents. I always thought it was weird to have vents in the floor instead of in the ceiling. But, that day I was happy. I went over and poured it down the vent. TA Da I thought, all gone. I was bad, what can I say. Thank goodness we grow up. Now I have to pray my kids aren't as bad as I was.
Skylar is feeling so much better now. His throat is healing well. And he is eating just about everything that he wants to eat. While he was all broken up I thought it would be fun to tell him some " when I was....."stories.
So, when I had my tonsils and adenoids out besides the hell fire in my throat I remember the tomato soup incident.
Picture this with me- Poor young girl struggling to breath and swallow. Needing nourishment and love to survive yet another day. I was hanging on by a thread and the thread was worn thin.
Can you picture that? Can you? Okay, some of that was true I swear. But, there was a ton of super Mario playing and endless ice cream bowls filled to the brim. Oh, and let's not forget about Kraft's Mac N cheese. My gut was so full of fake pasta and powdered cheese there was no way I was going to die from starvation.
So, anyway the lady I was staying with at the time had made me a little lunchy pooh one day. *Flash Back*I had my operation when I was 14, so my parents had already died and I was living with my 2nd family at that time.
Back to the little lunchy pooh. She had made me soup. Hot, thick, nasty tomato soup. I smiled and retrieved the Big bowl from her. And tried to look impressed and gracious. My brain went into over drive. What can I do to get rid of this mess. What are my options. I thought about the bathroom first. But, I was weak and maybe she would notice me walking down the hall. Or the pipes could clog up with it's nastiness! I thought about lifting the carpet and putting it under the pad. I know.....crazy, I was 14 on pain pills cut me some slack. And then I saw her scrawny miniature poodle sway into the room with it's little painted toenails. I never really liked that dog. JACKPOT!!!! Come here little darling!!!!!
She of coursed hopped on the bed and started sniffing the red mess. Her little tongue licked at it slow at first and then she was excited. I guess it must be better then puppy kibble. I noticed a little gagging going on and I took the bowl from her. And as if God was trying to punish me I noticed the dog had a RED mustache. WHY......LORD WHY!!!!!!
I tried to wipe it's little mouth clean and gave up because I was woosie. At this point I was tired and I looked on the floor where this particular house had it vents. I always thought it was weird to have vents in the floor instead of in the ceiling. But, that day I was happy. I went over and poured it down the vent. TA Da I thought, all gone. I was bad, what can I say. Thank goodness we grow up. Now I have to pray my kids aren't as bad as I was.
2.25.2009
Pop Corn
Pop Corn, Pop Corn!!! Who wants some of my Pop Corn!!!! Okay you will never hear Kaden ask if you want some of his Pop corn because the boy Loves his pop corn and can eat a whole bag all by his little self. So, as for sharing this 2 year old hasn't mastered that skill yet.
The other day it was raining....still. So we watched movies and of course with movies you have to have POP CORN!
2.15.2009
My Two Sons
My sweet baby boy left me last Friday. He did, I was surprised, but I had my suspicions about him for a few weeks now. He had been acting a little strange lately. The whole family is surprised by it all, we aren't sure what to do at this point. He left a trail of dirty diapers down the hall from our room which lead us to this freakin' monster baby. Crazy child, one with scary eyes they say in the old country. We never know what to expect from him day to day. Lord, be with us as we all travel the beaten path of "The Terrible Twoooooooooooooooooooos"
Yes, Kaden has changed. Today he had a tantrum that I KNOW my other two child people never exhibited. I was scared for my own life. Hell, where 's Chucky when you need him. Kaden was like Chucky's side kick or something. I'm going to have to get some Holly Water or garlic or something, because the baby has gone made. And you know what???? I'm not givin' in! I control this house baby!!! So, I cried inside & screamed at the same time this morning when he started head banging the wall. Thanh wanted me to pick him up and hand him over for Daddy. But, I told him no, that I wasn't going to give him attention for that kind of behavior. Every so often he would cut an eye over to me to make sure I was still there. Lord knows he wouldn't want to preform without an audience. I told Thanh that I had Kaden's number and if he would chill out I would pick up the phone amd dial it. That last sentence sounds so much better when you can see me shake my head with my hand on my hip- I promise, just visualize.
So, anyway finally he stopped acting all crazy and was just crying with the hiccups. And I called over to him and asked him if he would like to come over to Mommy and I'll hold him now. He stopped crying immediately amd I went over ans explained why I didn't get him earlier. Ten minutes later he was sound asleep being laid down for a nap. So, I know it was all because he was tired, but goodness, couldn't he had just grabbed a blanket and kick back in the Lazy boy instead of a 45 minute rendition of the Hulk Vs Tiny Tim. Ok maybe I was more like Mr.T but dang, it could have saved time, tears and his skull. HA HA
Tomorrow Skylar gets his tonsils and adenoids clipped. Yep, I can't wait, that boy always has a sore throat. He is going to feel much better and the world will be grand once again in his little peepers. We leave early, which I'm not so thrilled. But I will give a full update when we get back. Say a prayer for him please, he is a little scared. Any kind of surgery is a big deal in a child mind. I told him to look forward to all the ice cream & shakes that he wants for the first few days. That put a smile on his face.
Well, I'm off to start dinner. We are having a good bye tonsils & adenoids party. You had to be 'A Part of the Family" to be invited. Do you get it? A "Part". Once again it sounds better when you hear my voice.
Yes, Kaden has changed. Today he had a tantrum that I KNOW my other two child people never exhibited. I was scared for my own life. Hell, where 's Chucky when you need him. Kaden was like Chucky's side kick or something. I'm going to have to get some Holly Water or garlic or something, because the baby has gone made. And you know what???? I'm not givin' in! I control this house baby!!! So, I cried inside & screamed at the same time this morning when he started head banging the wall. Thanh wanted me to pick him up and hand him over for Daddy. But, I told him no, that I wasn't going to give him attention for that kind of behavior. Every so often he would cut an eye over to me to make sure I was still there. Lord knows he wouldn't want to preform without an audience. I told Thanh that I had Kaden's number and if he would chill out I would pick up the phone amd dial it. That last sentence sounds so much better when you can see me shake my head with my hand on my hip- I promise, just visualize.
So, anyway finally he stopped acting all crazy and was just crying with the hiccups. And I called over to him and asked him if he would like to come over to Mommy and I'll hold him now. He stopped crying immediately amd I went over ans explained why I didn't get him earlier. Ten minutes later he was sound asleep being laid down for a nap. So, I know it was all because he was tired, but goodness, couldn't he had just grabbed a blanket and kick back in the Lazy boy instead of a 45 minute rendition of the Hulk Vs Tiny Tim. Ok maybe I was more like Mr.T but dang, it could have saved time, tears and his skull. HA HA
Tomorrow Skylar gets his tonsils and adenoids clipped. Yep, I can't wait, that boy always has a sore throat. He is going to feel much better and the world will be grand once again in his little peepers. We leave early, which I'm not so thrilled. But I will give a full update when we get back. Say a prayer for him please, he is a little scared. Any kind of surgery is a big deal in a child mind. I told him to look forward to all the ice cream & shakes that he wants for the first few days. That put a smile on his face.
Well, I'm off to start dinner. We are having a good bye tonsils & adenoids party. You had to be 'A Part of the Family" to be invited. Do you get it? A "Part". Once again it sounds better when you hear my voice.
2.11.2009
Rain, Rain Go Away!!
It's such a gloomy day today. Rain Rain go Away. Come again when I don't have anywhere to go and there is a Lost marathon on TV. Or any other show that I like. Even a Bridget Jones Movie marathon. Hell anything on TV that's worth my attention. But, nooooooooooooooo! Today is full, full, full. And unfortunately 80% of it is away from the house. Which is why this post is going to be FAST!!!
I wanted to share some pics that was taken just a few beautiful days ago. A nice, sunny day of painting with the two younger children. I love moments like this.
Kaden is so into his masterpiece!
Concentrate, concentrate!
I wanted to share some pics that was taken just a few beautiful days ago. A nice, sunny day of painting with the two younger children. I love moments like this.
Kaden is so into his masterpiece!
Concentrate, concentrate!
2.10.2009
Eat my Elmo!
It was Kaden's Birthday Party last Friday. He loves Elmo so much. He walked around saying, "I eat my Elmo". Yes honey, you eat your Elmo. HA HA Kids, cute right? Well, sometimes when the moods right & PMS is not around the corner.
The night before everyone helped me blow up 50 balloons. Kaden loves anything with balloons. Everywhere we go he asks for one. Even when they have none to give, he still asks. At least he's consistent.
So, we covered the downstairs play room with them and filled his Zebra tent to the top. When he walked down the stair he saw the glow from the balloons and started screaming. BALLOONS!!!!!
It was a Kodak moment!
This is the face I saw all day long. Kate Gosselin would have died if she would have brought her happy bunch to our little shin dig. Because I dressed him in Red because I new Elmo's frosty fur was going to be all over him that day. And you know what? I didn't care! I mean how many times in our lives can we just chow down with not a care in the world at whose looking? Very few people, so eat I say, eat like no one cares!! And he did, and again and again and again. He ate 4 cupcakes that day. Elmo was a cupcake cake. And by the end of the day he was gone, thanks to everyone else that ate like nobody was watching. HA HA He was a mess and his cheeks were stained pink for two days afterwards.
He opened all of his gifts with precision. Hell, as a child I just ripped into. But, not this little boy. He just took his time and enjoyed every moment.
After everyone left I figured he needed to burn a little Elmo off. That or howl at the moon all night. So, we went outside to play a little soccer. Mark my word right now when I say that one day he will be a Pro Soccer player. He has been kicking around a ball since he was 11 months old. What a story he will have when he's famous.
2.08.2009
Note from Kaden
Hey Everyone!!! Mom is working on some real cool Blog things. She says that her Blog is going to have some color soon. Keep your fingers crossed. See Ya- Kaden
2.03.2009
What's the point
Warning! Short post ahead! Day 2 back on meds. My cold is almost gone, but I was more tired today then I have been. It's very interesting to see the difference even 3 doses make. I was reading the side effects & they were crazy.
Will cause upset stomach, blurred vision, sores, head aches, bones pain, vomiting, swelling, weight gain, extreme fatigue, weakness, loss of memory, blah, blah, blah. And that's not mentioning the serious side effects. I mean why the hell am I taking them for, right?
Whatever, I just keep praying & look forward. That's all you can do in this kind of situation. You can chose to lay down & let it eat you up or stand tall & kick ass until the end. I like kicking ass, it feels good!!!!!
Speaking of that, the book is coming along. I'm at a point now where I have never shared with anyone. Life changing stuff that I'm sure will shock anyone reading. This process is not only good for me, but as I write I think about the person in the future who will read it someday.
Well, I'm off to bed, got a big day tomorrow!
Will cause upset stomach, blurred vision, sores, head aches, bones pain, vomiting, swelling, weight gain, extreme fatigue, weakness, loss of memory, blah, blah, blah. And that's not mentioning the serious side effects. I mean why the hell am I taking them for, right?
Whatever, I just keep praying & look forward. That's all you can do in this kind of situation. You can chose to lay down & let it eat you up or stand tall & kick ass until the end. I like kicking ass, it feels good!!!!!
Speaking of that, the book is coming along. I'm at a point now where I have never shared with anyone. Life changing stuff that I'm sure will shock anyone reading. This process is not only good for me, but as I write I think about the person in the future who will read it someday.
Well, I'm off to bed, got a big day tomorrow!
2.01.2009
Journey called Life
I heard from my Dr. yesterday evening. And she squashed my dreams of laying off some meds for awhile. Poo Poo on her I guess. She told me that I hadn't been off of them long enough to start feeling the pain that would arrive if I didn't get back on them quickly. But, I swear I almost feel normal today. I made breakfast & cleaned with no pain. Just a tad tired, but nothing too bad. After we worshiped the Lord I wrote out & organized a whole weeks worth of school for both of the kids. When I say organize I mean worksheets, labs, projects, daily assignments, assessments, attendance & free time crafts assembled for when they get done early. Can you believe that??????? Most days I plan the day of & I'm usually in bed or laid up on the couch. Tell me there isn't something to this & I'll laugh in your face! :-)
After the school stuff I did Mary Kay stuff, made lunch, clipped coupons, started laundry, cleaned my purse, played play dough & puzzles with Kaden & still had energy to hang out with & friend over dinner. After dinner I bathed Kaden & played with him before we watched a movie with the kids. Now it's 8:45pm & I have some soreness & I am more tired. But, Most normal days I wake up more tired then I am right now.
So, she wants me to have my pharmacist fax the request to her personal fax & she is going to call with an appointment for this week. I really don't want to be a in a slush of pills for the rest of my life. But, I'm worried to not listen to her, because the fear of the pain & danger is so scary. Doctors definitely have a hold on you when there is an unknown. We don't know a lot about autoimmune diseases.
I am thankful for today, it was nice to feel normal & alive. To be able to move freely & without worry & concern. I hope tomorrow will be the same, how exciting it is to go to sleep tonight in hopes that tomorrow might be a present like the past few days have been. What if my Lupus is going into remission finally after five long years? It would be unbelievable, but graciously excepted.
I know I am bouncing off the walls here, my thoughts are everywhere. It's just that I'm hopeful & excited. Yet, scared & fed up. What a mix, don't you think?
All I can say is Lord, give me strength to get through what you have planned for my life. And help me be able to not only wear a smile, but help others through this journey we call life.
After the school stuff I did Mary Kay stuff, made lunch, clipped coupons, started laundry, cleaned my purse, played play dough & puzzles with Kaden & still had energy to hang out with & friend over dinner. After dinner I bathed Kaden & played with him before we watched a movie with the kids. Now it's 8:45pm & I have some soreness & I am more tired. But, Most normal days I wake up more tired then I am right now.
So, she wants me to have my pharmacist fax the request to her personal fax & she is going to call with an appointment for this week. I really don't want to be a in a slush of pills for the rest of my life. But, I'm worried to not listen to her, because the fear of the pain & danger is so scary. Doctors definitely have a hold on you when there is an unknown. We don't know a lot about autoimmune diseases.
I am thankful for today, it was nice to feel normal & alive. To be able to move freely & without worry & concern. I hope tomorrow will be the same, how exciting it is to go to sleep tonight in hopes that tomorrow might be a present like the past few days have been. What if my Lupus is going into remission finally after five long years? It would be unbelievable, but graciously excepted.
I know I am bouncing off the walls here, my thoughts are everywhere. It's just that I'm hopeful & excited. Yet, scared & fed up. What a mix, don't you think?
All I can say is Lord, give me strength to get through what you have planned for my life. And help me be able to not only wear a smile, but help others through this journey we call life.
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