Every since I was knee high to a grasshopper I've had a Special relationship with the Lord. I remember nights singing to him until I would fall asleep. I'd tell him all my secrets most little girls would whisper to their Barbie dolls or friends on the playground. I would secretly pray to him when an ambulance whizzed by or when I caught a glimpse of tragedy on the nightly news.
This all came about I'm sure because every single year I was in a new school, new town, new house....thanks to my Dad serving in the Navy. I never connected with people, never had the sleepover, back yard birthday party experience. It was just me, my parents, and the Lord. I never realized how important my relationship would truly become one day. How I would need to depend and lean on Him so much. That one day I would not be able to breathe without him filling my lungs first.
Even as I grew up and became a young adult God was my center rock. As life changed and I married there became a distance between God and I. Almost like a child moving out and starting their own life. Coming home to visit only when laundry needs to be washed or a late bill needs desperately paid. That was me in my late 20's and early 30's. Autism, Kids, making my Husband happy, homeschooling, health matters, money, just life in general became my primary focus. God was just for church, nightly prayers and the daily distress pleas.
I lost my relationship, Not my Belief.
It took something drastic in my Family to bring me to my knees. To fall at the Lord's feet and have the Veil lifted from my eyes. I had been running scared for years instead of living in light. It's a Beautiful thing to wake up without a heavy confused heart. I have this amazing sense of Peace!
We all have a God Shaped Hole that we try to fill up with
money, addictions, other people's love and approval, material things, desires, job titles, fame, likes and friends on social media and ton of other things that make us Stay in Denial.
But, when we realize that Nothing fits in that hole but a relationship with God we will then find Peace, Wholeness, Acceptance, Love, Contentment, Grace, Satisfaction, Thankfulness, Hope, Health, Friendship and Clarity. I have this right now, just like I did as a little girl.
Have you ever experienced this kind of Spiritual Transformation?