3.27.2014

A Ray of Sunshine


Ohhhh the Meltdown, it can happen at any moment over just about anything.  It can be Fast and Furious or Slow and Dreadful.  I'm on a Mission right now to understand Meltdowns, Kaden's Meltdowns.  When he is calm and clear headed I have been lightly questioning him on his thoughts about them.  The word he uses often to explain is Overwhelmed.

I get Overwhelmed, we all do.  What Overwhelms him to the point he punches himself and screams bloody murder?  All I did was tell him it's Bath Time or we need to go to Social Skills or to eat Dinner. 

I'm keeping a journal to Understand his Meltdowns better.  Whatever is Triggering this Feeling in him I want to not just eliminate it, but teach him how to move Past it.

This Picture was taken toward the end of an hour long Meltdown.  I gave him a 15 minute warning that he would need to turn off Minecraft to leave for Social Skills.  He was fine and Happy....YAY!!! :)  From numerous other times I have learned to minimize the amount of steps to give him before we leave.  So, after breakfast 5 hours before hand I already had him dressed except socks and shoes. 
Now, I pop my head in and say finish up what You need to do on your game, we have 5 minutes before we need to shut it off and leave.   Still 90% of the time everything will be Positive.  Thumbs up, Thank You Lord!!! 
Ok, now it's time to turn it off and........and then all Hell breaks loose!  It's like a different Kiddo, where did my Kaden go?  

After 30 minutes, sometimes hours into a Meltdown there is like a little window of Opportunity to reach him and pull him out.  It looks like a ray of Sunshine peaking out between two rain clouds.  It sounds like a Hushed throat sound mixed with Silence.  You have only moments to jump in and turn it around or a whole new tsunami of rage and emotions will start back up again.  And unfortunately this can also happen if you make the mistake of thinking you saw a ray of Sunshine when it was just regular old light.
Sounds weird, I know.....but, once your through the battle and you convince him to move on to the next activity you start to feel less defeated.  
 
I get asked all the time how do I know he's not just being a typical brat?  Well, for the Millionth time Kaden does not meltdown because he isn't getting a new toy at the store or because he wants more ice cream.  He is a RULE Enforcer.  You can see the Struggle, Disappointment and Exhaustion in his eyes.  It's more of a cry for HELP.  Almost 100% of the time he does not remember having the meltdown or what started it.  He expresses to me the feelings of being Overwhelmed and Disoriented.  Like too much info going in at one time.  That's why he said it's like playing 10 CDs at the same time, nothing makes sense.

I have my work cut out for me that's for sure.  But, I'm Thankful for him...he is Worth it.

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